WBB Life Issues and Resolve.

[Clifford Gillmore]

Welcome to my very own "I'm a sad meathead" thread! I'm a complete depressed heap today, and I thought I just share - yanno, cause I can?

Well, I'm working 70 odd hours a week, inbetween gyms and I seem to have develop a terrible relationship with my girl.

Work; Wages are terrible, only clearing enough to pay bills, debts, food etc. Customers are upper-middle class to upper class bonefied ******s, It appears I'm there to clean their shoes on the way out of the shop so they can get all of that working class scum off their feet.

Gyms; Rec centre membership has ended, thank christ, and I found a uni gym near my work which has all the toys I could ask for! Only grief is I'd be the biggest guy there, and the first installment is going to be diffcult to pay unless I sell some gear (car?).

Relationship; No matter what the f*ck I do for this girl she is never happy, I'm an utter b*tch for her. Treat her perfectly, drive her where she wants to go, take her to places she wants to go, buy all drinks and food, show her as much affection as I can - including getting her off everytime she wants it. On that note, I still havn't had an orgasam with her. After she gets what she needs she simply doesn't want anymore. Now, I can live with that.

Its the fact she hasn't got a car, job, still lives with her parents, goes out on a whim etc. etc. That concerns me a little, but its still nothing. I can live with being used, I guess I'm trying to make this work because all of my other relationships have been a complete waste. I just don't know if I'm lying to myself because I'm that damn insecure, or if this is as good as it gets.



So thats the breakdown of all of my exciting life. I need to listen to 'The Haunted' and eat a pint of ice cream, while watching reruns of Will and Grace.

[Sensei]

Work: That sucks. I think most of us that've been on the planet for a few decades have had at least one or two jobs that were pretty bad. 70hrs/week is pretty rough though, and I've never had workloads like that for very long. I'm pretty impressed that you've somehow found energy for training and any kind of social life... Hang in there on this - be as aggressive as you can about finding something new and better.

New Gym: I'm going through the same thing basically. The athletic director recently revoked my privileges to the weight room. I'm not currently coaching and that was his excuse, but I have a feeling that he just didn't like the fact that I was lifting there on my own. It didn't matter that I was working with a special needs kid in there every week and took him to a powerlifting meet, or that he got a trophy, or that now it breaks my heart every time he asks me "Are we going to lift again this week?"... Sorry, now I'm ranting... Anyway, I hate the new gym and hate the limited hours but we'll be like Borg and adapt, right?

Relationship: Does she know that you haven't...? I can't imagine that she'd be so cold as to not care... If you are truly just being used and she doesn't care about you, spend more time in the weight room or improving your current work situation. Dump her and don't worry about finding a new relationship until work and training improve. Later, work on finding someone who you can respect and will respect you.

[PeterGriffin]

Yeah man, you don't have to take the bitch's crap. Dump her. Plenty of other women out there.

[sharkall2003]

Love and romance and everything is great in a relationship, but it should never be a one-sided deal. I would suggest talking to your girlfriend about how you feel the relationship is going. As of now, according to you, it seems that it's all give and no take. You're getting nothing, while your lady has everything. Anyways, best of luck with your job, training and the relationship.

Remember, good things happen to good people. Eventually, if you're a good citizen/person, you'll receive back what you put in; that's how it works.

[Darcy Tucker]

Establish what you want different in the relationship. Tell her, and if it does not change you gotta dump her.

[drew]

Work: Man, I've been there. When I was in school, full course load plus 60-70 hours of work a week. It's hard. You just gotta keep finding ways to move up. Even if it's a little step. Always look for a new angle. There are lots of jobs.

Gym: Here's an idea. Find out who's in charge and try to work out a deal. Maybe the coaches or trainers can use an assistant? Like, a free assistant for 10 hours a week. In exchange, you get to lift there for free (or for a significant reduction). I know, the last thing you need is another job, but it could be very valuable if it works out. And really, there's no harm in trying, the worst they can say is no.

As far as your girlfriend. You need to lose her. From the way you describe her, she sounds like a leach. She's going to get what she wants, period and doesn't care about anyone else. Seems like a very selfish person. I'll bet she makes you feel like she does everything for you too. She probably tries to make you feel guilty about it. But really, she sounds a lot like my ex-wife.

[DumbellDude]

Risk, you can't built a healthy relationship like this one man. You could talk to her, but if you NEED to talk about stuff like these, I don't think it's going to change anything, and you'll end up spending more time with her because you might think she understood. You'd better off with no relationship, than a bad relationship. How long in that relationship?

As for job, that is rough man. How realistic to get a better paying job? I know you're young and don't think about it yet, but you might want to start saving some money for later.


As shark said, good things happen to good people. Thinks will come about.

[DumbellDude]

she sounds like a leach
Bingo

[RBB]

work and the gym will get better. are you in school right now, bro? i know what its like to have to work full time and go through school. its tough. as far as the girl, get rid of her. you don't need people like that in your life.

[Canadian Crippler]

Risk, don't bull**** us. We all know the whole first part of your post was just an excuse to start yet another WBB relationship thread. :p

Dump her.

[lifter4life]

Gyms; Rec centre membership has ended, thank christ, and I found a uni gym near my work which has all the toys I could ask for! Only grief is I'd be the biggest guy there, and the first installment is going to be diffcult to pay unless I sell some gear (car?)

forget losing your car, ditch the chick, bro.

[Powdered_Power]

Love: if all the effort is coming from you, shes probably all too aware that you feel alot more for her than she does for you...a problem I know all too well bro and like everyone is trying to tell ye here. The only way that things will get better is to dump her, it might feel like hell for a while but youll definately be better off without her in the long run.

Work: That sounds like a pain in the ass allright, I remember my time as a bartender and people thinking for some reason they can treat ye like ****. What I did was very simple, one day I had enough so I quit the job... plain and simple. One of the best moves I made in my life as when I really started looking for a new job I got a very cushy, well paid office job. Determination will get you very far man as you probably know yourself, being in the shape you are!

Good luck anyway!

[accuFLEX]

You really need to dump this girl

[arya202]

Now I ain't saying she's a goldigger...

Well I think we all know the rest, it's probably been played in various gyms about a million times.

[d'Anconia]

Yeah you might as well end that relationship now. Why let it drag out for even longer when you could be with a better girl?

[Progress]

You haven't had an orgasm? Her goal should be the same as yours; get the other person off. She has failed in doing so. She doesn't sound like someone whom is worth your attention.

[Joe Black]

Really take a hard look at work. If its frustrating you, do what you NEED to do to get out of it. Change gyms or industry. You have to make some goals and just take ACTION.

As for the girl, do you realise by doing all that stuff for her she is taking you for granted and its not causing her to feel attracted to you.

Put some space inbetween you and her, call her less, less than she does you and do much less for her. I think you'll find she'll act better... Or just lose her.

Change work, change the girl, its all quite realistic to get done, you just have to decide its what you want and simply take action to doing it.

[Maki Riddington]

Stop feeling so sorry for yourself and get your head out of your ass and do something about it. Nothing is going to change if you don't act now.

I'm sure you know what needs to be done. Nobody here is gonna light a fire under your ass to make you change so you might as well suck it up and quit hosting such a depressing pity party.

[Gutz981]

Don't have to dump the girl. Just stop kissing her ass. Then if she don't start suckin you off, then you have the green light on dumping her.


Edit: If all else fails...throw it in her cousin, best friend and/or mom.

[Clifford Gillmore]

Thanks everyone for the input. I had a chat with her last night and she tried to convince me about how ashamed she was of the situation, then tried to turn it around on me - So I just said "I don't think I'm getting as much out of this relationship as you are, and if you think I am then we just don't belong". A true show of character on her behalf, the whole time I was thinking 'This what I deserve?'.


As for the work sitauation I shouldn't complain, customers are crap where ever I go - and this industry is something I'm very good at, and I have alot of pride in my work. I'm putting in my resume for a high tier store in the city if I can find someone to replace me at my current place.



Everyone hear has said the same thing, I guess I just lied to myself to convince myself I was happy. Never a-f*cking-gain. Thank you WBB :)

[DumbellDude]

You deserve to be happy bro :) Life's too complicated not to be happy every single moment.

[SkinnySadMan]

What everybody said... ditch the girl. Oh crap, wtf am I giving advice for, I have no women experience!

Good luck with the new job, let's hope for the best so you don't have to work 70 hours a week. (HOLY CRAP SEVENTY HOUR WEEKS!!!!!!!)

[Progress]

You deserve to be happy bro :) Life's too complicated not to be happy every single moment.

What are you in grade school?

[soul71]

shes treating u like **** coz she can

show her u wont put up with it, shel learn her lesson.. and once she realises she has something to lose things will change dramatically

[DumbellDude]

What are you in grade school?
Why you ask progress?

[Progress]

Why you ask progress?

All I know is you aren't happy every single moment of your life. If you are, you're missing something.

[DumbellDude]

I'm far from happy 24/7 man. All I'm saying is that you have to try.

[Focused70]

*summons Mrelwooddowd and Xian to this thread*

[Progress]

I'm far from happy 24/7 man. All I'm saying is that you have to try.

Fair enough.

[sharkall2003]

All I know is you aren't happy every single moment of your life. If you are, you're missing something.

Life is what you make of it. I have been rejected by a few women (happens to everyone, I know), I have been in car accidents, nearly lost my dad to a car accident, and failed calculus (caused a few scholarships to be lost). Out of every situation I learned something and made positive action to correct it.

I was in Sports and Entertainment Marketing today and the teacher talked with us about this very subject. He explained that everyday, no matter how bad things are, he wakes up and says "this will be a great day." Everytime I see this guy he has a smile, is polite and does the best he can to help everyone. The point I am trying to make here is life's to short to find negatives in situations. You have to look for ANY possible positive from every situation.

[d'Anconia]

*summons Mrelwooddowd and Xian to this thread*

Psssht. Someone needs to work on their conjuring skills.

[Sensei]

I was in Sports and Entertainment Marketing today and the teacher talked with us about this very subject. He explained that everyday, no matter how bad things are, he wakes up and says "this will be a great day."
Sounds like Jerry McGuire's mentor.

[Tryska]

don't know what to tell you about work or the gym.


as for the girl - stop being Cap'n Save-a-Ho. it's not even like you're getting any of the good stuff for all your trouble. if she's still living with her folks and they don't require her to support herself, what's she need you for anyway?


oh yeah - you've got the car to drive her places. :idea: