Deciphering Personals Ads

[Relentless]

Thought this one was scarily true...

well, OK not true, but kinda funny.



Here you go, all the "codes" for the profiles...just what we need to know!
WOMEN'S ADS
40-ish...................... 49
Adventurer............... Slept with all your friends
Athletic.................... No tits
Average looking.........Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful................... Pathological liar
Contagious Smile........Does a lot of Ecstasy
Educated.................... Banged her Political Science professor
Emotionally Secure.....Medicated
Feminist.................... Fat ballbuster
Free spirit................. Junkie
Friendship first........ Trying to live down reputation as a slut
Fun......................... Annoying
Gentle...................... Comatose
Good Listener........... Borderline Autistic
New-Age................... All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned............ Lights out, missionary position only, no BJs
Open-minded............. Desperate
Outgoing................... Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate............... Sloppy drunk
Poet........................ Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional.............. Certified Bitch
Redhead................... Bad dye-job
Reubenesque............. Grossly Fat
Romantic.................. Looks better by candle light
Social...................... Has been passed around like an hors doeuvres tray
Voluptuous................ Very Fat
Weight proportion
w/height.. Hugely Fat
Wants Soulmate........ Stalker
Widow....................... Drove first husband to shoot himself
Young at heart.......... Old bat

MEN'S ADS
40-ish................ 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic............. Watches a lot of NASCAR
Average looking..... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated.............. Will patronize the **** out of you
Free Spirit........... Banging your sister
Friendship first.... As long as friendship involves nookie
Fun...................... Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking......... Arrogant
Very good looking..... Dumb as a board
Honest................. Pathological Liar
Huggable.............. Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Likes to cuddle...... Insecure mama's boy
Mature................ Older than your father
Open-minded......... Wants to sleep with your roommate but she's not interested
Physically fit........ Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Poet.................. Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom stall
Sensitive............. Cries at chick flicks
Very sensitive.... Gay
Spiritual............. Got laid in a cemetery once
Stable................ Arrested for stalking, but not convicted
Thoughtful.......... Says "Excuse me" when he farts

[MaFi0s0]

hahah thats funny, i could imagine it being true aswell

[Goin_Big]

I thought you were gonna get yelled at by a lot of women until I got to the guy's part, lmfao.

[kimpy225]

i thought i saw this before

http://www.wannabebigforums.com/show...ght=Adventurer

[Relentless]

Doh.