My home...a dictatorship?

**fixationdarknes** · 10-09-2006 02:03 PM

Today my dad was freaking out at my little chihuahua. Fiona, the dog, was barking crazily at something. I tried to tell her to be quiet, but she wouldn't. So my dad runs up to her and hits her (she's only 5-lbs, and I don't want her getting hurt). I say to my dad "Don't hit her!" He looks me in the eye, and says "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!! I'M THE FATHER OF THIS HOUSE!!!" "YOU'RE RUNNING ON A VERY THIN LINE!!!"

This was probably the maddest he's ever been at me. What the hell? Am I living in a dictatorship? My dad exercises supreme power over the whole household and no one can ever speak out against his poor judgment?

And by the way, this isn't really about my dog. It's mainly about my dad becoming all Ho Chi Minh over the past years. What am I supposed to do?

And are there any fathers here on this forum who could offer advice?

By the way, my dad has always been (in my opinion) a nice and cool dad. He's not an alcoholic and he's never done anything really bad. It's just lately he's been getting all prideful and seems to never listen to what others have to say. He does everything HIS WAY.

**galileo** · 10-09-2006 02:07 PM

Short answer: yes.

You live in his house where he, in all likelihood, pays the bills and deals with your mother. When you move out, you get to do what you want. It sucks, but that's the life of a 16 year old.

**fixationdarknes** · 10-09-2006 02:10 PM

Damn. Well either way, I'm never letting him hit my dog again.

**Steele** · 10-09-2006 02:12 PM

Respect your dad, and feel grateful that he is there for you. Many peeps didn't get/don't have the opportunity of having a father figure.

-Steele

**Nik00117** · 10-09-2006 02:14 PM

Heh my dad hit my dog and i'd hit him. But other then that yea hes in charge basically... But if my dad ever hit my dog it'd be on.

**Bohizzle** · 10-09-2006 02:16 PM

did u buy the dog? either way the dog is in his house, although him hitting ur dog isn't cool, and hitting ur dad cuz he hit ur dog isn't cool.

**rookiebldr** · 10-09-2006 02:18 PM

I agree with Gal. However, one can hope your mother is in the partnership and it is run as a joint dictatorship. On another note you might want to seek to understand why he's been changing over the last little while. There is likely something else that's bothering/frustrating him causing him to lash out now when he normally doesn't.

**Steele** · 10-09-2006 02:19 PM

Fundamentally, he's not becoming Ho Chi Minh, this is taking it completely out of context. Maybe he was having a really stressful day? It wasn't right for him to hit your dog, but perhaps try to understand his position.

-Steele

**fixationdarknes** · 10-09-2006 02:21 PM

My sister bought the dog, but she gave it to me as she is now off at school and married and her apartment does not allow pets.

I DO respect my dad. I just wish he actually listened to me every once in a while.

And I have never hit my dad. I wouldn't ever go that far. I'm not afraid of him, but I would never start physical **** like that.

**fixationdarknes** · 10-09-2006 02:24 PM

You're probably right. He must have been really stressed.

And at times like this I can only hope my mom is part of that dictatorship, because she can soften him at critical times.

**Bohizzle** · 10-09-2006 02:26 PM

Originally Posted by fixationdarknes

My sister bought the dog, but she gave it to me as she is now off at school and married and her apartment does not allow pets.

I DO respect my dad. I just wish he actually listened to me every once in a while.

And I have never hit my dad. I wouldn't ever go that far. I'm not afraid of him, but I would never start physical **** like that.

sorry didn't mean to say that u hit ur dad, meant to reference another poster's comment.

**Steele** · 10-09-2006 02:26 PM

Q: Does the power all parent/s have over their child(ren) before their coming of age, stem from a duty to see that the child(ren) develop into morally principled people?

-Steele

**rookiebldr** · 10-09-2006 02:27 PM

Originally Posted by fixationdarkness

You're probably right. He must have been really stressed.

And at times like this I can only hope my mom is part of that dictatorship, because she can soften him at critical times.

Yeah, my wife is constantly at me about how I "sound" to our teenage daughter when exasperated. Very much a moderating effect.

**Sensei** · 10-09-2006 02:41 PM

I think it's time that your sister took responsibility for her own dog... Either that or you need to find it another home - it's not like it's a reasonably-sized dog that can take it.

**WBBIRL** · 10-09-2006 02:43 PM

Well, I'd never physically act out aginst my father but the sheer size difference between the two of us keeps him at bay 95% of the time. He's never really done anything I would consider to be crossing the line and neither have I. He pays the bills, and basically runs this household and while im not contributing in any major manor its basically his way or the highway. Thats about the worst that would happen, I dont think he would start a physical confrontation or anything like that.

Respect your father as I do mine, pay your dues and do you best to keep the dog on a leash if you care about it.

**Maximus96** · 10-09-2006 04:04 PM

all fathers do this, mine did when i got a bit older. think millions of years ago when there was power struggles between the father and son when the son was of age, its the same thing.

**MixmasterNash** · 10-09-2006 04:06 PM

I would feed to the chihuahua to a reasonably sized dog.

**BigRic** · 10-09-2006 04:41 PM

I think the most serious issue in this thread is you telling everyone that you own a chihuahua, thats embarassing.

**DarrenEff** · 10-09-2006 05:29 PM

Originally Posted by Sensei

I think it's time that your sister took responsibility for her own dog... Either that or you need to find it another home - it's not like it's a reasonably-sized dog that can take it.

The dog clearly is not the issue, nor why he started the topic. If the dog wasn't present, I'm sure something else would have set his father off.

**Beast** · 10-09-2006 05:42 PM

If you live in his house, you have to abide by his rules.

And I'm not condoning his beating of your dog. The guy probably has a lot on his mind.

**bloodninja** · 10-09-2006 06:14 PM

A chihuaha is not a dog, it's a football. Which is perfectly suitable for throwing and kicking.

**Jordanbcool** · 10-09-2006 07:01 PM

^You're out of control!

**WORLD** · 10-09-2006 08:01 PM

You have to give him a reason to respect what you say. My father used to be the same way, but now he will listen and consider everything when I speak. Prove yourself, basically. Your young though, and have time to do just that in the next few years.

**fixationdarknes** · 10-09-2006 09:12 PM

Thanks for the replies everyone.

**Sensei** · 10-09-2006 09:22 PM

Originally Posted by DarrenEff

The dog clearly is not the issue, nor why he started the topic. If the dog wasn't present, I'm sure something else would have set his father off.

Maybe it is the issue and maybe it isn't. It could very well be that he isn't happy that his daughter who should be perfectly able to take care of her own dog, chooses not to own up to her responsibilities. Not only that, but his son reprimands him when he decides to take out his frustrations on the dog.

I'm not agreeing with the father btw... I just think it's pretty clear that the dog should be somewhere else.

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