The Five Biggest Contradictions in Fitness
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The Five Biggest Contradictions in Fitness

Itís no secret that when people contradict themselves, it has the effect of making the flaws in their actions or statements seem glaringly obvious. But what about when WE ourselves get caught contradicting ourselves by someone else?

By: Nick Tumminello Added: January 6th, 2014
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  1. #1
    Geordie The_Chicken_Daddy's Avatar
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    What does your car say about you?

    Acura Integra
    I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.
    Acura Legendary
    I'm too bland for German cars.
    Acura NSX
    I am impotent.
    AMC Gremlin
    I could only afford three-fourths of a Hornet.
    AMC Marlin
    My father wouldn' t buy me a Camaro.
    Audi 90
    I enjoy putting out engine fires
    Audi 80
    I thought the 4000s was too fast.
    Austin-Healey 3000
    I can put raw meat on the transmission hump and have a well done steak by the time I arrive anywhere.
    Buick Park Avenue
    I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
    Buick Riviera Convertible
    I'm not very smart, and I look like it too.
    Buick Electra
    Hey, it's 30-year old technology. But it's GOOD 30-year old technology.
    Buick Reatta
    I like ugly, impractical, boring cars.
    Cadillac Cimarron
    I am stupid enough to pay extra money for an uglified Chevrolet.
    Cadillac Eldorado
    I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
    Cadillac Seville
    I am a pimp.
    Chevrolet Camaro
    I enjoy beating up people.
    Chevrolet Chevette
    I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette.
    Chevrolet Corvette
    I'm in a mid-life crisis.
    Chevrolet El Camino
    I am leading a militia to overthrow the government.
    Chrysler 5th Ave
    Did the pushpins come free with the headliner?
    Chrysler Cordoba
    I dig the rich Corinthian leather.
    Datsun 280Z
    I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well.
    Dodge Charger
    Reliable is boring. My car is exciting.
    Dodge Dart
    I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower.
    Dodge Daytona
    I delivered pizza for four years to get this car.
    Ford Fairmont
    (See Dodge Dart)
    Ford Mustang
    I slow down to 85 in school zones.
    Ford Crown Victoria
    I enjoy having people slow to 55mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them.
    Geo Storm
    I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
    Geo Tracker
    I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.
    Honda del Sol
    I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all.
    Honda Civic
    I have just graduated and have no credit.
    Honda Accord
    I lack any originality and am basically a lemming.
    Infiniti Q45
    I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending.
    Isuzu Impulse
    I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
    Jaguar XJ6
    I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year.
    Jeep Wrangler
    I am fiercely independent, just like all my friends with Jeeps.
    Kia Sephia
    I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu.
    Lotus Esprit
    Ever pay $2000 for a tune up? I do.
    Lincoln Town Car
    I live for bingo and covered dish suppers.
    Mercedes 500SL
    I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph.
    Mazda Miata
    I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler.
    MGB
    I am dating a mechanic.
    Mitsubishi Diamante
    I don't know what it means either.
    Mitsubishi Eclipse GST
    Why accelerate? Because you can!
    Nissan 300ZX
    I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
    Oldsmobile Cutlass
    I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts.
    Peugeot 505 Diesel
    I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
    Plymouth Fury
    I like driving an air-conditioned sofa that can carry your car in my trunk as a spare.
    Plymouth Neon
    I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena.
    Pontiac Trans AM
    I have a switchblade in my sock.
    Porsche 944
    I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me.
    Renault 2CV
    I think your car is ugly too.
    Rolls Royce Silver Shadow
    I think Pat Buchanan is a tad too liberal.
    Subaru Legacy
    I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu.
    Triumph TR6
    I am an amateur mechanic who enjoys a challenge.
    Toyota Camry
    I am still in the closet.
    Volkswagon Beetle
    I still watch Partridge Family reruns.
    Volkswagon Cabriolet
    I am out of the closet.
    VW Rabbit GTi
    My mom won't let me buy a Porsche 'til I finish Algebra.
    VW Jetta
    I stopped smoking pot when I got a real job after college. I swear.
    Volkswagon Microbus
    I am tripping right now.
    Volvo 740 Wagon
    I am frightened of my wife.
    Volvo 240
    Other drivers are unsafe. Let me go ahead and pull out in front of this guy to slow him down.
    "Geordie/'d3c:di/n. & adj. Brit colloq. n. 1 a native of Tyneside. 2 the dialect spoken on Tyneside. adj. of or relating to Tyneside, its people, or its dialect. [the name George + -IE]

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  3. #2
    Party of "No." Tryska's Avatar
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    23,191
    stfu DL. tuttut

    *lol*

    mine's gonna say i am a broke-ass mofo. this friday.
    A little learning is a dangerous thing...

    Live Dangerously! Learn a Little!


    Dude, did Doogie Howser just steal my fucking car?

  4. #3
    MulletII - AKA Ninja Boner Gyno Rhino's Avatar
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    I drive a 240SX. Which ain't on there. But I'll just match it with the 300 for good measure.
    Founding Member and CEO of the FFFA

    "All that matters is beauty on the inside! Outside beauty doesn't matter!"
    ~This is something ugly people say to feel better about themselves...

    "Strength and size don't matter! It's not fair to judge training knowledge based on strength and size!"
    ~This is something wussy people say to feel better about themselves...

    Pearls of Wisdom...


    Resident Ninja Demon (with a pet Radioactive Sloth) and SchlonkeyMaster of WBB!

    Rock is my 'Big Viking Brother', and not in a homo-esque way.

    And no COLON jokes, bastards!

  5. #4
    Ex-Mod Jane's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
    Location
    Yale
    Posts
    3,747
    Goddammit I'm not a lemming.
    "Then on leg day do squats, lunges, stiff legged deadlifts, fluffernutters, and calf raises."--Belial, training a newbie

    PowermanDL on Russian culture: "Big furry hats come into play somewhere."

    "The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly; it is dearness only that gives everything its value. I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress and grow brave by reflection. 'Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death." --Thomas Paine

  6. #5
    Senior Member InferiorDesign's Avatar
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    Mar 2002
    Posts
    625
    my car says im normal, is that an option?

  7. #6
    Dead Sexy Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2001
    Posts
    1,767
    "Honda Civic
    I have just graduated and have no credit."


    TOO funny

  8. #7
    Tuna Freak Frankster's Avatar
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    Jan 2001
    Location
    Tuna Land
    Posts
    1,482
    I drive a ford escort too
    Eat Tuna!
    "Ya don't touch my tuna, I don't kill you."- by Tuna Master
    "Part of getting what you want is knowing what you have to give up." - by who knows. ME? Eat Tuna!
    My Journal - My FitDay -

  9. #8
    Push powerlifting heathj's Avatar
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    Mar 2001
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    WA, USA
    Posts
    5,234
    Sweet! What year? Mine has a spoiler!
    Last edited by heathj; 04-07-2002 at 04:12 PM.

  10. #9
    Tuna Freak Frankster's Avatar
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    mine is ugly its a 97 I think
    Eat Tuna!
    "Ya don't touch my tuna, I don't kill you."- by Tuna Master
    "Part of getting what you want is knowing what you have to give up." - by who knows. ME? Eat Tuna!
    My Journal - My FitDay -

  11. #10
    Tuna Freak Frankster's Avatar
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    Jan 2001
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    Tuna Land
    Posts
    1,482
    what is a spoiler?
    the wing thingy in the back, if so mine too Shweeet
    Eat Tuna!
    "Ya don't touch my tuna, I don't kill you."- by Tuna Master
    "Part of getting what you want is knowing what you have to give up." - by who knows. ME? Eat Tuna!
    My Journal - My FitDay -

  12. #11
    BODYLICIOUS BABE Celestial's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Location
    On a tropical beach in Florida :)
    Posts
    2,345
    They didnt list myc ar LOL
    WHEN LIFE ****S YOU IN THE ASS, YOU GOTTA JUST TURN IT AROUND AND **** IT RIGHT BACK!!!!!! - ME

    I am a fatass thank you very much! LOL

    Bodylicious Babe


    My max bench is @110 x 8

  13. #12
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Posts
    185
    I drive a ferrari. It's not on the list, I don't know what to do.

  14. #13
    FREAKZILLA
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
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    with my freaks admiring my peaks
    Posts
    0
    I drive a camaro and I do enjoy beating people up
    Thier's no one finer the Scott Stiener- Scott Stiener

    Big Poppa Pump is your hook-up holla if ya hear me- Scott Stiener

    Damn it feels good to be a Gangsta.....

  15. #14
    Super Mastah Mod rookiebldr's Avatar
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    Jan 2002
    Location
    Oakville, Ontario
    Posts
    6,341
    Acura Integra
    I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars.

    I love anyway.

  16. #15
    Rockin' the midlife crisis xraygirl's Avatar
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    Jan 2001
    Location
    Meadville PA
    Posts
    1,366
    I have a red and black 4-Runner. It says "middle-aged chick with an aversion to mini-vans".
    "I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific." -Lily Tomlin

  17. #16
    As I Am Paul Stagg's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2000
    Location
    Baltimore, MD, USA
    Posts
    8,668
    Mine says:

    "My wife won't let me buy what I want."
    Squats work better than supplements.
    "You know, if I thought like that, I'd never put more than one plate on the bar for anything, I'd never use bands or chains, I'd never squat to parallel or below, and I'd never let out the slightest grunt when I lift. At some point in your lifting career (assuming you're planning on getting reasonably strong and big), you're going to have to accept that most people think you are some kind of freak." -Sensei
    "You're wrong, and I have a completely irrelevant pubmed abstract that may or may not say so." - Belial
    I has a blog.
    I has a facebook.

  18. #17
    King Nothing ericg's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2001
    Location
    Maine, USA
    Posts
    6,196
    Nothing for the Toyota Celica??

    LOL at Geo Storm, I had one when I was in Highschool!!!

    Geo Storm
    I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
    Current Stats --------------- Training Goals: Improve athletic conditioning.
    Squat - 305lbs - 1/23/06 ----- 335
    Deadlift - 415lbs - 2/4/06 ---- 435
    Bench - 90s*7 ----------------- 100s*5
    Weight - 208 ------------------ 190
    Height - 5'10"

    My Journal|My Routine|My FitDay
    WBBB|"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up" - Thomas Edison

  19. #18
    Wannabebig Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    Nova Scotia
    Posts
    14
    I didn't see anything about my sh*t box Geo Metro?????

  20. #19
    Forsaken by Destiny jell999's Avatar
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    Jan 2002
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    Beyond Your Depth of Perception
    Posts
    661
    I dont have a switchblade in my sock.

    But I do have a baseball bat in the back seat.


    Good list.
    Push the envelope/Watch it bend.

  21. #20
    P o S e R kAiXuan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    albuquerque, nM
    Posts
    1,685
    Jeep Wrangler
    I am fiercely independent, just like all my friends with Jeeps.
    haha

    GHYNO RHYNO, dont compare your little 240 to a 300.............tuttut closest thing you could compare to is TOYOTA CAMRY
    -deFenDeRs oF thE unDerRateD

    If it doesnt make dollars, then it doesnt make sense

    I never knew how skinny I was untill I started gaining a little weight

  22. #21
    Senior Member The Calvinator's Avatar
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    Mar 2002
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    682
    way to go kAiXuan, i got a wrangler too!! I guess since i am independent, i dont need a lifitng partner....
    you can see mine here http://www.bds-suspension.com/pride_joy45.htm
    it does the trick....
    Don't just call me pessimist. Try and read between the lines. I can't imagine why you wouldn't Welcome any change, my friend. I wanna see it all come down. suck it down. flush it down.

  23. #22
    Wannabebig Member
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    Collinsville
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    Any word on a Dodge Stealth yet? Too broke for a Viper, tired of Mustangs...

  24. #23
    MulletII - AKA Ninja Boner Gyno Rhino's Avatar
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    Originally posted by kAiXuan
    GHYNO RHYNO, dont compare your little 240 to a 300.............tuttut closest thing you could compare to is TOYOTA CAMRY
    Only reason I compared the two was that they're both Nissan. *laugh* It ain't no Camry. ****, you drive a Wrangler, right? What would you know about fast cars. Not to mention spelling.
    Founding Member and CEO of the FFFA

    "All that matters is beauty on the inside! Outside beauty doesn't matter!"
    ~This is something ugly people say to feel better about themselves...

    "Strength and size don't matter! It's not fair to judge training knowledge based on strength and size!"
    ~This is something wussy people say to feel better about themselves...

    Pearls of Wisdom...


    Resident Ninja Demon (with a pet Radioactive Sloth) and SchlonkeyMaster of WBB!

    Rock is my 'Big Viking Brother', and not in a homo-esque way.

    And no COLON jokes, bastards!

  25. #24
    Senior Member Ken Masters's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Vancouver, B.C.
    Posts
    257
    Originally posted by Gyno Rhino


    Only reason I compared the two was that they're both Nissan. *laugh* It ain't no Camry. ****, you drive a Wrangler, right? What would you know about fast cars. Not to mention spelling.
    Gyno what year is your 240? I'm a fan of Nissan. I would love a Skyline GT-R. 300zx twin turbo would be nice too.

    Wrangler? You need a FourRunner with IFS to do some real off-roading.

  26. #25
    MulletII - AKA Ninja Boner Gyno Rhino's Avatar
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    Jun 2001
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    11,468
    My year is a '91. Best cams, best engine. Great car with a lot of potential for modifications. I'd take the 300 with TT, just because of the style. But the Skyline is a speed-demon. Nissan is the BEST.
    Founding Member and CEO of the FFFA

    "All that matters is beauty on the inside! Outside beauty doesn't matter!"
    ~This is something ugly people say to feel better about themselves...

    "Strength and size don't matter! It's not fair to judge training knowledge based on strength and size!"
    ~This is something wussy people say to feel better about themselves...

    Pearls of Wisdom...


    Resident Ninja Demon (with a pet Radioactive Sloth) and SchlonkeyMaster of WBB!

    Rock is my 'Big Viking Brother', and not in a homo-esque way.

    And no COLON jokes, bastards!

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