Hello, my name is Billy Evans. I am a very sick little boy. My mother is typing this for me because I can't. She is crying. The reason she is so sad is because I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except when I try to breathe. The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on account of us having no money or insurance. I would like to have a body transplant, but we need more money. Mommy doesn't work because she said nobody hires crying people. I said, “Don't cry, Mommy,” and she hugged my burlap bag. Mommy always gives me hugs, even though she's allergic to burlap and it makes her sneeze and chafes her real bad.
I hope you will help me. You can help me if you forward this e-mail to everyone you know. Forward it to people you don't know, too. Dr. Johansensteiner said that for every person you forward this e-mail to, Bill Gates will team up with AOL and send a nickel to NASA. With that funding, NASA will collect prayers from school children all over America and have the astronauts take them up into space so that the angels can hear them better. They will then come back to earth and go to the Pope. He will take up a collection in church and send all the money to the doctors. The doctors could help me get better then. Maybe one day I will be able to play baseball; right now I can only be third base.
Every time you forward this letter, the astronauts can take more prayers to the angels and my dream will be closer to coming true. Please help me! Mommy is so sad, and I want a body. I don't want my leaves to rot before I turn 10. If you don't forward this e-mail, that's okay. Mommy says you're a mean, rotten and heartless bastard who doesn't care about a poor little boy with only a head. She says that if you don't stew in the raw pit of your own guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die a long, slow, horrible death and then burn forever in hell! What kind of cruel person are you that you can't take five freakin' minutes to forward this to all your friends so that they can feel guilt and shame about ignoring a poor, bodiless nine year old boy?
Please help me. I try to be happy, but it's hard. I wish I had a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty. I wish I could hold a kitty that wouldn't chew on me and try to bury its turds in the leaves of my burlap body. I wish that very much!
Billy “Smiley” Evans
"The whole jedi thing was just not compatible with my lifestyle. My master was jelous he was always holding me back, -"be mindfull of the future, but live in the present"- what the hell does that mean? I even got my arm cut off...it just sucked. So i switched to the dark side and i havent looked back once...Now i am shooting lightning from my fingertips, choking people over the phone, i even get to wear a cape.....its just boss. My name is Anikin skywalker and i am a sith lord."
"i have the sex drive of 10 rabbits on viagra"
height: 5'8'' (im lieing its probably 5'7'')
weight: 159-165 lbs (morning and day)
goals for end of the year 405/500/600 at 170-175(with the 8pack)
other: dips 3 and a quarter plates for 4 reps
I should start a f*cked up chain letter like that, only about ninjas and pirates and ninjas.
Vin Diesel has a fever.. and the only prescription is more cowbell.
Budiak: That girl I maced
Budiak: heh maced
Budiak: I wish
ShmrckPmp5: a good thing people can't fire guns through the computer...your ass would have been shot years ago
Y2A 47: youre smooth as hell
Y2A 47: thats why you get outta tickets, and into panties
galileo: you're a fucking beast and I hate you
assgrabbers are never subtile, they will grabb ass whereever they go,public or not, I know the type, because I am one. - Rock
you're gonna help the kid right? LOL
*lmao@"right now i can only be third base"*
A little learning is a dangerous thing...
Live Dangerously! Learn a Little!
Dude, did Doogie Howser just steal my fucking car?
I want a ninja chain letter......
Beachbody coaching lets you turn your hobby into a career - Beachbody
i started this chain letter last week and it has spread so far
send him another damn bundle of leaves
'you cant avoid confrontation in life. it just makes things more trouble down the road. sometimes you have to look at the bull and say "f--k you bull" and grab that bull by the horns'
Originally posted by Tryska
*lmao@"right now i can only be third base"*
at least hes getting somewhere.
...watch me reap of what I sow....
and BOOM goes the dynomite!
Hey! Didn't I see that kid in the all star game?
Third base you said right?!
If he ever pisses you off ... Get a match!
aw poor kid...
we got a chain letter once.. and threw it away.. a month later somebody broke into our house..
ps. chain letters suck!
For every $1 you donate to the "buy Lude more weight plates foundation", you will help add 1kg to my 1RM.
<spam> Journal </spam>
Status: UD2`in it.
Current Stats: 85kg @ 13.6%
Goal: 87-88kg @ 8-9%
Goal Due Date: 1/12/05