The Five Biggest Contradictions in Fitness
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The Five Biggest Contradictions in Fitness

It’s no secret that when people contradict themselves, it has the effect of making the flaws in their actions or statements seem glaringly obvious. But what about when WE ourselves get caught contradicting ourselves by someone else?

By: Nick Tumminello Added: January 6th, 2014
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  1. #1
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    Dilemma….I would like your advice… Umm I need your advice.. Please

    Hello Im in a serious dilemma and it’s with a girl so if your not interested please feel free to ignore it. Im sure some of you have been in a situation like this before, I would really like your advice.

    Its your typical story. There is a girl who I know whom has a kid and a man. I found her very attractive the second I first met her. She is a beautiful person, I don’t know too many people who meet her without being attracted to her in some way form or shape. Don’t get me wrong she is not a supermodel she is just a stunning person, pretty great personality, etc

    Like I stated earlier she has a child and lives with the father… they are on the verge of breaking up, she is actually looking to move out now. I partied with her a while ago and had a great time. For about two weeks she was all I could think about, every song I heard, every breath I took, I would feel her…. You know what I mean,.

    Well I went out with her tonight for a few drinks, and once again we both had a great time. I just dropped her off, and she called its (12:20 AM) to ask if I wanted to do something tomorrow. I do not hang out with this girl, she has never even phoned me. I have only went out with her twice ever, it is basically a date or at least that is the impression I got. I was astonished when she told me it was her, and naturally responded “yes”.

    Now of course there are complications
    1: She has a man, I have met him a few times, despite the fact that they are on the verge of splitting I don’t thing he would be happy if I started dating her (I know I wouldn’t, I am sincere enough that I don’t want to hurt him. I am not worried about conflict as much as I am worried about hurting him).

    2: She has a child… in reality I guess this isn’t really a big deal

    3: I work with near her (an affiliated company at the same location), it’s a place I work at once a week for fun and it really doesn’t matter. I don’t need the job, I have a career but I just “hang out” there one weekday evening a week.

    4: One of her friends has a crush on me big time and could potentially be hurt. I dated her for a while but it was a “friendly dating relationship” we went to dinner together and movies etc. But not much more.

    5: I am seeing a lady now who I am attracted to but don’t think I will last with. We are just getting to know each other….actually in relation I am not worried about this girl at all she is dirty anyways.

    I guess my question should I stay away from her? I do crave her! But is it worth it. She will be splitting regardless but still. I am going on the date tomorrow, maybe that isn’t even what its about (a date), but by the tone in her voice, I think she wants me to take her out. After this date if the opportunity arises do I pursue it? Do I wait tell she gets a new house then pursue it? Do I stay away?

    This is very serious, I am in-between a rock and hard place. I don’t know how to approach it, I think either way, I will regret it. I would appreciate it if you did not flame or joke, not cause I cant take it but because it ruins the thread. Serious responses seem to dwindle after the first flame or joke. If you really want to flame me start a new post about me, phone me and yell, or email.

    Thanks Guys I Appreciate Your Advice.
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  3. #2
    Bad Monkey! Nights's Avatar
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    Let's go through this point by point.

    1) Who cares if she has a boyfriend. That's between her and him. Chances are if she's willing to go out with you then it's over. Either that, or she's the type of girl that you don't want to be with.

    2) A child is a really big deal if you think to make this serious. Or if she does. Do not just dismiss this as "oh, whatever" if either of those cases are true. Think carefully about it.

    3) Don't see how that's a deal at all.

    4) Let her deal with her friends. If you like her, and she likes you, then the person who has a crush on you shouldn't stand between you. I'm guessing by the fact you didn't say you liked her friend that there isn't going to be a future with the two of you, so why let it stand between a future with this other girl?

    5) Decide if this girl that you are seeing is worth it or not. Decide if this new girl is worth losing the one you are seeing already. And no matter what else, end it with the old before starting. Don't keep the old one on the side just in case.

    Other then that, all I gotta say is go out on this date. See what happens from there. Live life.
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  4. #3
    Soon to be lean... Joe Black's Avatar
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    I would ask her seriously what she wants to do.

    Say you are happy to get with her, the kid doesn't bother you (if it doesn't) but you are not gonna attempt to build something while she is with this other guy.

    Tell her how it is. You like her, but it needs to be you and her.
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  5. #4
    Mystic Eric
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    Originally posted by Hulk
    Say you are happy to get with her
    LMAO 'I very happy to get with you" LOL! HAHAHA

  6. #5
    Soon to be lean... Joe Black's Avatar
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    prob not in those exact words
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  7. #6
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    Thanks for the replies...
    LOL, I am usually the type of guy that just sort of lets things progress. Maybe I should come out and ask

    "Why are we here?" not so bluntly but you know what I mean. I find in traditional or normal dating this is a little pushy and may scare her a way. Maybe in this case it would be appropriate due to the circumstances. I do have a feeling of guilt. Hmm I dunno
    Last edited by Junior; 09-12-2002 at 06:02 AM.
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  8. #7
    MulletII - AKA Ninja Boner Gyno Rhino's Avatar
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    Don't help her cheat on her man. That's lame. If she really is interested in you, she'll split it off with him.
    Founding Member and CEO of the FFFA

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  9. #8
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    wise words, Gyno

  10. #9
    Player Hater PowerManDL's Avatar
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    Rock 'n roll.
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  11. #10
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    Im sorta starting to think im ****ed and shouldn't even pursue this. I wil lsee her tonight and see how it goes. And I will not help her cheat don't worry. But im thinking it may be wiser to stay away or err maybe not... oh god damnit
    Last edited by Junior; 09-12-2002 at 03:38 PM.
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  12. #11
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    she just wants to create drama gtfo

  13. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gyno Rhino View Post
    Don't help her cheat on her man. That's lame. If she really is interested in you, she'll split it off with him.
    Agreed. Regardless of the situation, shes being a bit shady with the whole situation. I wouldn't want the same situation turned around on me if my girl was going behind my back.

    Talk to her about it bro.

  14. #13
    Moderator Off Road's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Oregon View Post
    Agreed. Regardless of the situation, shes being a bit shady with the whole situation. I wouldn't want the same situation turned around on me if my girl was going behind my back.

    Talk to her about it bro.
    I'm sure that he has it pretty well sorted out NINE YEARS LATER!
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  15. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Off Road View Post
    I'm sure that he has it pretty well sorted out NINE YEARS LATER!
    Haha you gotta love the huge bump. Don't hate.

    Seriously though.. I got lost browsing and must have not paid any attention to the dates. Sorry about that.

  16. #15
    Rob Schilke | GFX Designer thecityalive's Avatar
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    Make sure she's loading carbs...oh, wait....wrong advice.
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  17. #16
    Become Unbreakable Mark!'s Avatar
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    Fucking hippys damnit!
    Last edited by Mark!; 07-07-2011 at 10:43 PM.
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  18. #17
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    I can't believe you dismissed the child as "not a big deal". That is enough to maybe make me stay away. Even if she was single and there was no "man" in the picture, she has a child and if you wanted to be a part of her life, you'd have to be a part of the kid's.
    "Every light must fade, every heart return to darkness!"
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  19. #18
    Beefcake razorcut's Avatar
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    Now 9 years later the kid is probably in college, so I say go for it.

    Seriously though. This had red flags/drama written all over it. I'd bet a large sum of $$ if this was pursued further at the time, it ended up badly.......
    Last edited by razorcut; 07-08-2011 at 05:10 AM.
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  20. #19
    Senior Member BilltheButcher's Avatar
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    I would not have a serious conversation after 3 dates. So I would avoid where is this relationship going convo.

    Can she handle being on her own? Can she afford rent/mortgage without her current husband/bf? Does she have a job and does she have day care/babysitter?

    Reason why I ask is, if you get in a relationship with her and she doesn't have all these things in place, guess who gets to pay if you want to stay with her?

    Also what mom can go out two nights in a row? A.) without her man getting suspicious. B.) is willing to be away from their kid, 2 nights in a row.

    Have your fun, but I would steer clear of a serious relationship.
    Never shall innocent blood be shed, yet the blood of the wicked shall flow like a river. The Three shall spread their blackened wings and be the vengeful striking hammer of God.

  21. #20
    Cardio bunny Alex.V's Avatar
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    Hey guys, you never know, he could still be wondering. Maybe he's been waiting on some resolution from this thread.
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  22. #21
    Senior Member Sensei's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Off Road View Post
    I'm sure that he has it pretty well sorted out NINE YEARS LATER!
    Well, yeah, just in case...
    A child does not learn to squat from the top down. In other words, he does not suddenly make a conscious decision one day to squat. Actually, he is squatting one day and make the conscious decision to stand. Squatting precedes standing in the developmental sequence. This is the way a child's brain learns to use the body as the child develops movement patterns. Therefore, a child is probably crawling, rocks back into a squatting position with the back completely relaxed and the hips completely flexed, and stands when he has enough hip strength. This approach makes a lot of sense and can be applied to relearning the deep squat movement if it is lost. -Gray Cook
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  23. #22
    Senior Member BilltheButcher's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Belial View Post
    Hey guys, you never know, he could still be wondering. Maybe he's been waiting on some resolution from this thread.
    Excellent. Didn't even see the date.
    Never shall innocent blood be shed, yet the blood of the wicked shall flow like a river. The Three shall spread their blackened wings and be the vengeful striking hammer of God.

  24. #23
    Soilwork addict.
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    Time solves everything!

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    Quote Originally Posted by StormTheBeach View Post
    I think I am just going to start posting dick pictures on here until this thread gets deleted.
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  25. #24
    OVERCOME krazylarry's Avatar
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    I do wonder what happen, to bad TS has not been on in 3 years.
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  26. #25
    Become Unbreakable Mark!'s Avatar
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    Maybe the chicks husband killed him. Maybe they weren't really on the verge of breaking up, and she just wanted a boy toy on the side.
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