April 6th, 2003
Tomorrow I rededicate myself to a goal I've long held, but never reached; to hit 10% bodyfat. I've been dieting since f*cking forever. Since joining WBB a little over a year ago, approximately 10 months of that time has been spent dieting, only 2 months bulking. And I'm still (relatively speaking) a fat-ass. Something is seriously f*cking wrong with this picture. I have no one to blame but myself. While I've certainly put in a good deal of work, I always manage to sabotage myself by f*cking up in one way or another. I'm hoping the little 'WBB Cutting Contest' is enough motivation for me to get my sh*t together.
Since I'm still using Lyle McDonald's program, which I'm disallowed from discussing here, I'll unfortunately have to be quite vague as I was in my last 'journal' (though I hesitate to call it that) Also, I'm quite busy at the moment as I've got an internship and am working part-time as a personal trainer. So, I don't know how much time I'll have to dedicate to this journal. Hopefully, my entries won't be too infrequent, though.
Anyway, here are my main failings at present, which I hope to remedy:
[list=1][*]Going overboard during my refeeds
My last refeed I ate somewhere in the vicinity of 1500g of carbs in 36 hours. That's 6000kcal BEFORE you even consider fat (which I've been pretty good about) or protein. Total calories were probably around 7000-8000kcal. I'm a firm believer in refeeds. And in making them big. But not this big. I'm hoping to reduce my carb intake over this 36 hour period to about 900g or so. Also, I want to keep my fat and fructose intake lower.
[*]Eating too many carbs on my dieting days
This one's difficult given that I'm training fairly high-volume part of the time, and I feel like absolute sh*t on low carbs. I can't concentrate and I can't sleep. If I'm required to do either, what I often do is say 'F*ck it.' and eat some carbs. I dunno that there's a real good solution to this problem. I do want to hit 10%bf, but I still need to function. Previously, before I started f*cking off with my diet, I'd eat a bunch of sugar free Jello or something to try and curb my cravings. Seemed to work okay. I need to get back to that, rather than having a handful of cookies.
[*]Eating sh*ttily and too much on my maintenance days.
On my diet, I have a number of days where I'm not required to 'diet' per se. Per Lyle's description, one can sorta relax about things. For me, this isn't an option. I have to put myself in the mindset that these are as much hypocaloric days as the true 'dieting' days. Otherwise, I allow myself too much leeway and end up eating too much. I may even start using EC on these days if it seems like I can't get my sh*t together.[/list=1]
It begins tomorrow.