I've been reading the site on and off for a while, and felt the need to post out of frustration, so pardon if I babble...
Quick history of me...
6/2000 I weighed about 295lbs (5ft 10)
I decided I needed to change, I didn't want to go another birthday looking the way I did. Over the next year I lost over 100lbs and 6/2001 I weighed between 185-190lbs. (Just to note, I followed the EAS Body For Life plan).
I was starting to feel better about myself, but I knew that I had a long way to go for some muscle.
I know it's my own fault, but due to stress with the circumstances of life (read: differences in relationship), Over the next 2 years I put back on a lot of weight (I'm about 215-220 today). No matter what I try, I just cant seem to get the ball rolling again.
I used to feel satasfaction out of a workout (even though, I knew I really wasn't strong, but deep down inside I felt like I made some form of progress). Anyway. No matter what I do, I feel like I can't make any strides (especially in strength). I'm frustrated because I am so weak (I dont care that I can't lift like Flex Wheeler, I understand my natural limits, but I can barely put up 2 60lb db's on a flat bench press, can't do any pullups, barely any pushups).
I'm comfortable doing cardio (weather it's 20-30 mins of running on a treadmill or 2 to 3 miles joggin/running around the neighborhood). But I get frustrated because I feel like I'm making no progress. (Maybe I need to increase the amount/intensity of cardio and do it less days(Maybe calm down the worn out factor))
I feel guilty if I go a morning without running. I feel guilty if I put salad dressing on something(I use Ken's Light Ceaser on my George Foreman cooked grilled chicken) (I only use fat free/low fat dressing, in low moderation). Lately I *always* feel full, as if I'm too fat for my skin. I could eat a chicken breast and a half cup of brown rice and feel it. I don't eat anything fried, I don't drink soda, rarely drink beer (moderate other alchohol only on weekends, and not every weekend). Nearly never eat sweets. (I gave up all that stuff when I went all out in 6/2000)
I've been making a hard effort to get enough sleep (I used to live on 4 to 6 hours a night), but I've been forcing myself to goto bed no later than 11pm (and I'll get up between 5:30 and 7:30 depending on which office I have to go to).
A typical day of eating is the following:
1. Eggbeaters/oatmeal or MetRX bar
3. Grilled Chicken w/Veg or Wendy's grilled chicken sandwich or Salad
5. Chicken/Rice, Chicken/Pasta (no red sauce, no cheese, etc), Salmon/rice, Steak/Rice, Any other chopmeat dish (meatloaf/burger), only using 93% lean.
6. (sometimes) Myoplex
That's an average day, I get my water in as best as I can, sometimes I will wind up skipping a meal (sometimes I'm too busy at work to stop, etc).
I can post a typical training week later, but I've babbled enough for now, but it's pretty much Chest/Shoulders&Tris/Back&Bis/Legs Abs done when I have time on lifting days and depending on the day I'll either go back to back 2 days in a row, or a day off between.
Anyway, thanks for reading my babble. I'm sure I've forgotten something. Any words of wisdom are greatly appreciated.