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Thread: Wolfe's new diet :)

  1. #1
    Wolfy!!!!! bigbadwolfe's Avatar
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    Wolfe's new diet :)

    Ok not really but I got this email from a buddy and it kinda made me laugh casue he know's I'm dieting

    Since I have several Boston Terriers, I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog (?).

    On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete, so I was going to try it again.

    I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, guy who was behind her.

    Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned. I told her no; I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt and a car hit me.

    I thought the guy was going to need help as he laughingly staggered to the door.

    Tell me that is not some funny stuff
    MONSTER MODE

  2. #2
    *Bingo Fuel clawhammer_33's Avatar
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    Thats ****ing awesome.

    Your my new personal hero.
    Face it: biceps are the muscle that classifies you as a muscle man.

    Striding across the fields, carrying a vorpal blade, cometh Clawhammer! And he gives a bloodthirsty bellow:

    "As sure as predators devour prey, I shall paint the town a sanguine shade of doom!!!"
    Hilarity

  3. #3
    Senior Member
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    rofl you own
    2000 or bust

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  5. #5
    Administrator chris mason's Avatar
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    That is pretty good stuff Mike!


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  6. #6
    Senior Member getfit's Avatar
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    Friggin awesome!
    You will soon see Getfit in OngII Flying Knee Thingys of Doom see if the feisty greek can survive the kicks of Steel Leg From Shaolin Soccer,Dim Mak(def touch) from ChungLee,and Flying Crane by Daniel-san-El Pietro

    Spray it with windex greek!-the famous El Pietro

    You be quiet or i'll clean and press your narrow francophone self-Callahan

    Lift for gains,not glory.Control your ego and the weight

    What a strong girl! This leads me to believe you can severly injure most of the male population-Nick Hatfield

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    Hot in terms of both speed and... well new hotness- Stash

    gain 50lbs-Anthony

  7. #7
    It is time Kana's Avatar
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    Good stuff!
    "The individual who goes the furthest is generally the one who is willing to do, dare and attempt new things. The sure thing boat never gets far from shore." - Dale Carnegie

    "The most important quality is to live the life you want to have, not the life you have." - Dave Tate

    "I firmly believe that any man's finest hour - his greatest fulfullment to all he holds dear - is that moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle, victorious." - Vince Lombardi

  8. #8
    Senior Member Sidior's Avatar
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    I <3 you
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  9. #9
    Ex-Manwhore KingWilder's Avatar
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    haha awesome
    5'10", 170lbs, 10% bf

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  10. #10
    Risk10k Clifford Gillmore's Avatar
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    Haha! I chuckle!



    I have a habit of doing that kind of stuff with customers all the time.

    On Subject of Relatives, - Inlaws


    Risk; My mother in law is fantasic
    Customer; Oh, thats refreshing

    Risk; In fact I just got her a plane ticket for my birthday.
    Customer; You bought her a present on your birthday?

    Risk; I did indeed, there is only so much that woman can do. Its nice to a give a little too.
    Customer; Thats a lovely attitude, what did you get her?

    Risk; A one way plane ticket to Iraq.










  11. #11
    ritz600 ritz600's Avatar
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    :evillaugh wolfy rules!

  12. #12
    Iron4Life
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    Nice one Wolfy..
    If the tall man was laughing out the door.. what was the reaction of the lady who asked the question?

    I can image something like: "SMART AS_"

  13. #13
    Senior Member Eszekial's Avatar
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    LOL WOLFY!

    What are you dieting down too? I want to see you at 9%, 320 lbs HAHA.

    That would be a sick world.
    Eszekial's Journal
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  14. #14
    Footballer
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    You should have just said "No, it's for me. Here's your sign"
    Calgary Stampeder!
    Formerly a CMU Chippewa!

  15. #15
    There may be hope yet. JustinASU's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRic
    You should have just said "No, it's for me. Here's your sign"
    If I hear another Blue Collar Comedy quote, I'm gonna go homicidal.
    Credulous at best
    Your desire to believe in
    Angels in the hearts of men.
    But pull your head on out of your hippie haze
    And give a listen
    Shouldn't have to say it all again

  16. #16
    Senior Member
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    Screw Bench-Pressing, you could be a professional bull****ter. That's some solid improv... keep up the good work!

  17. #17
    Footballer
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    Quote Originally Posted by JustinASU
    If I hear another Blue Collar Comedy quote, I'm gonna go homicidal.
    That's funny right there.
    Last edited by BigRic; 08-03-2006 at 02:39 PM.
    Calgary Stampeder!
    Formerly a CMU Chippewa!

  18. #18
    Senior Member Eszekial's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JustinASU
    If I hear another Blue Collar Comedy quote, I'm gonna go homicidal.
    :withstupi
    Eszekial's Journal
    Age:20
    Height: 6'1
    Weight: 200
    Body Fat: 12%
    Bench: 265x3
    ATFSquat: 315x3
    Dead: 275x3

  19. #19
    Not Done Yet ShockBoxer's Avatar
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    That's awesome. Did you buddy say where he got the story?
    The Reconstruction Project (Journal)

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