The Five Biggest Contradictions in Fitness
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The Five Biggest Contradictions in Fitness

Itís no secret that when people contradict themselves, it has the effect of making the flaws in their actions or statements seem glaringly obvious. But what about when WE ourselves get caught contradicting ourselves by someone else?

By: Nick Tumminello Added: January 6th, 2014
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Thread: Note to self

  1. #1
    Senior Member Jinkies's Avatar
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    Note to self

    Everyone who has ever made a few mistakes and have taken mental note of the to not do things.

    Note to self never wipe your ass with the same hand you just applied icy hot to your back with.

    I had a rough night, for all those who are bitchin about relationship issues go give that a try

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  3. #2
    Back in business WBBIRL's Avatar
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    Heres my little story about Icy Hot.

    I put it on my quads one night after football practice because they were sore as **** and getting tight. Well I kinda used too much and my underwear decided to apply some to my balls and mr happy. Lets say it was an unpleasant experience.

  4. #3
    sissy Bohizzle's Avatar
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    LMAO on that same note, don't rub bengay on ur innerthighs unless u have 3 hours to lie spread eagle. otherwise expect ur nuts to get very very warm.

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  5. #4
    Is cutting down to 9% Jordanbcool's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by WBBIRL View Post
    Heres my little story about Icy Hot.

    I put it on my quads one night after football practice because they were sore as **** and getting tight. Well I kinda used too much and my underwear decided to apply some to my balls and mr happy. Lets say it was an unpleasant experience.
    Ouch.

    I once, had a friend that told me it felt really good to use icy hot while.....pleasuring yourself.

    We arent friends anymore.
    Getting back in the groove
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  6. #5
    Back in business WBBIRL's Avatar
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    Mine felt so bad that I couldn't have touched it if I wanted too... so I don't see how he could have enjoyed it.

  7. #6
    Superman sharkall2003's Avatar
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    Don't keep your contacts in for a couple weeks straight, then take them out and put in eye solution that has a red top. You won't be able to see, literally.
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  8. #7
    5-0-9 Barbell WORLD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by WBBIRL View Post
    Heres my little story about Icy Hot.

    I put it on my quads one night after football practice because they were sore as **** and getting tight. Well I kinda used too much and my underwear decided to apply some to my balls and mr happy. Lets say it was an unpleasant experience.
    dude me too.. except it was a bet for me. But i did it, and for a few hours I was not a happy camper. Oh and water only made it worse lol
    "Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education alone will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race." - John Calvin Coolidge

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  9. #8
    Back in business WBBIRL's Avatar
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    I tried to sit in a tub of ice, but the numbness was as bad as the hotness so I figured atleast I was able to lay nice in my bed.

  10. #9
    ANVIL POWER Detard's Avatar
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    i put rub a535 on my pecs one time and got some on my nips. wow that REALLY hurt.
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  11. #10
    Getting un-streamlined Progress's Avatar
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    There was a guy on our varsity soccer team in high school who had gotten Icy Hot on his balls after applying it to his groin. He rectified the situation by dipping those balls in the JV water cooler. Not everyone has means to remedy the situation but his seemed to be doubled edged.

    My rule is to never use Icy Hot since it doesn't work. If I'm in enough pain to consider using it, it's also enough pain for it to not have an appreciable effect.

  12. #11
    Is cutting down to 9% Jordanbcool's Avatar
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    I was always an ice person..

    Just put it in a bag, and it worked pretty well for me...no stink, no mess.
    Getting back in the groove
    "I'll tell you a secret. Something they don't teach you in your temple. The Gods envy us. They envy us because we're mortal, because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we're doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again." - Achilles, (Troy 2004)
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  13. #12
    el imposible ectx's Avatar
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    A buddy of mine in grad school did something similar, only with a ton of habeneros and jalapenos. The guy loved peppers. He took a little cup full of them and made himself a sammich. He didn't have a fork and the boy was anxious so he dipped both hands in the cups and placed the peppers between slices of bread. He ate, then decided to go to the bathroom.

    There was no wiping or washing of the hands...just concentrated habanero and jalapeno hot stuff.

    My buddy, gary, then takes a leak.

    Not 5 minutes later, he's done, and starts to feel uncomfortable.

    Intense burning sensations are coming in places that aren't suppose to feel this way without physical contact.

    10 minutes pass and the kid is on fire. He thinks something is seriously wrong with him...he doesn't correlate the peppers and the unwashed hands with the burning pecker.

    He takes a shower...which was a bad idea. It spreads it around some more...he's freaking out and about to walk to the ER (being at university with a medical school has its advantages) when his boss, an MD comes in...he sees the guy sweating etc...sits him down and asks him a series of questions and quickly figures out that it was the peppers that were irritating his employee's pecker. Pouring a little milk on there fixed everything up. LOL.

    All he kept on saying was "thank God I didn't go into the ER because I could just see the med students laughing their asses off at me".

    moral of the story, when eating peppers, make sure you wash your hands before taking a leak.

    and yes, it was very funny to see this guy squirm.
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  14. #13
    Wrecker of Homes d'Anconia's Avatar
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    Psssht when I was on varsity football in high school we *made* some of the JV kids put icy-hot on their nuts. Funny at the time but looking back it was kinda lame...

    Sharkall I don't get your contact lense thing, but I don't know hardly anything about contacts anyway...
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  15. #14
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    I remember in college a couple of friends and I acted like we were rubbing Bengay on our nads to trick our friend into doing it. Of course he fell for it, and all I remember is him sprinting to the bathroom, leaving behind a trail of his clothes, hahahaha

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  16. #15
    Banned phreak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jinkies View Post
    Note to self never wipe your ass with the same hand you just applied icy hot to your back with.
    I don't know how things are done in the US, but here in Europe we actually use toilet paper to wipe our asses. That would have prevented this whole painful situation.

  17. #16
    Superman sharkall2003's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by d'Anconia View Post
    Psssht when I was on varsity football in high school we *made* some of the JV kids put icy-hot on their nuts. Funny at the time but looking back it was kinda lame...

    Sharkall I don't get your contact lense thing, but I don't know hardly anything about contacts anyway...
    Red tip on bottle means: DO NOT PUT IN YOUR EYES. Also keep your contacts in for more than a day will severely dry them out to the extent that you can sometimes not close them as the eye lid is so dry that the skin that can cover the eye can not because it rubs and causes more irritation. Not being able to close your eyes mixed with the wrong solution will kill your eyes for about an hour.

    Edit: I thought we were noting things not to do.
    Last edited by sharkall2003; 12-13-2006 at 06:00 AM.
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  18. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by phreak View Post
    I don't know how things are done in the US, but here in Europe we actually use toilet paper to wipe our asses. That would have prevented this whole painful situation.
    LMAO, that's the first thing I thought of too, wtf?

  19. #18
    Breaker of Skulls Guido's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ectx View Post
    A buddy of mine in grad school did something similar, only with a ton of habeneros and jalapenos. The guy loved peppers. He took a little cup full of them and made himself a sammich. He didn't have a fork and the boy was anxious so he dipped both hands in the cups and placed the peppers between slices of bread. He ate, then decided to go to the bathroom.

    There was no wiping or washing of the hands...just concentrated habanero and jalapeno hot stuff.

    My buddy, gary, then takes a leak.

    Not 5 minutes later, he's done, and starts to feel uncomfortable.

    Intense burning sensations are coming in places that aren't suppose to feel this way without physical contact.

    10 minutes pass and the kid is on fire. He thinks something is seriously wrong with him...he doesn't correlate the peppers and the unwashed hands with the burning pecker.

    He takes a shower...which was a bad idea. It spreads it around some more...he's freaking out and about to walk to the ER (being at university with a medical school has its advantages) when his boss, an MD comes in...he sees the guy sweating etc...sits him down and asks him a series of questions and quickly figures out that it was the peppers that were irritating his employee's pecker. Pouring a little milk on there fixed everything up. LOL.

    All he kept on saying was "thank God I didn't go into the ER because I could just see the med students laughing their asses off at me".

    moral of the story, when eating peppers, make sure you wash your hands before taking a leak.

    and yes, it was very funny to see this guy squirm.
    HA! Great story, man.
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  20. #19
    Back in business WBBIRL's Avatar
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    I keep my contacts in for weeks at a time, almost long enough to throw them out before I have to put them into the solution overnight one time and then wear them an additional week and pitch em out.

  21. #20
    Getting Swole hoser813's Avatar
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    my highschool hockey team used to joke around with icey hot in the locker room sometimes. Well one time they tried to put some in my cup.... i thought I had gotten it all out. Boy was I wrong. During our warm up, it started tingling and I thought it felt pretty good. About 2 minutes later my nuts felt like they were in a bench vise with a blow torch underneath them. I skated right off and dunked them in the sink for the rest of practice. But I found the culprit and got him back next week.
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  22. #21
    AM MMA Fighter crazedwombat's Avatar
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    Speaking of contacts, dont take them out and fill your thing up with CLEANER instead of solution. I had both in my eyes before the pain started.... clawing at your eyes in terror is not the way to solve the problem either.
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  23. #22
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    Um, thanks for the advice and the great laugh.
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  24. #23
    Banned bjohnso's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ectx View Post
    A buddy of mine in grad school did something similar, only with a ton of habeneros and jalapenos. The guy loved peppers. He took a little cup full of them and made himself a sammich. He didn't have a fork and the boy was anxious so he dipped both hands in the cups and placed the peppers between slices of bread. He ate, then decided to go to the bathroom.

    There was no wiping or washing of the hands...just concentrated habanero and jalapeno hot stuff.

    My buddy, gary, then takes a leak.

    Not 5 minutes later, he's done, and starts to feel uncomfortable.

    Intense burning sensations are coming in places that aren't suppose to feel this way without physical contact.

    10 minutes pass and the kid is on fire. He thinks something is seriously wrong with him...he doesn't correlate the peppers and the unwashed hands with the burning pecker.

    He takes a shower...which was a bad idea. It spreads it around some more...he's freaking out and about to walk to the ER (being at university with a medical school has its advantages) when his boss, an MD comes in...he sees the guy sweating etc...sits him down and asks him a series of questions and quickly figures out that it was the peppers that were irritating his employee's pecker. Pouring a little milk on there fixed everything up. LOL.

    All he kept on saying was "thank God I didn't go into the ER because I could just see the med students laughing their asses off at me".

    moral of the story, when eating peppers, make sure you wash your hands before taking a leak.

    and yes, it was very funny to see this guy squirm.

    If these peppers were hot enough to burn his skin, how the hell did he ever ingest them?

  25. #24
    Senior Member Jinkies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by phreak View Post
    I don't know how things are done in the US, but here in Europe we actually use toilet paper to wipe our asses. That would have prevented this whole painful situation.

    I've got a big ass and small hands

  26. #25
    Chubbilicious. VikingWarlord's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ectx View Post
    A buddy of mine in grad school did something similar, only with a ton of habeneros and jalapenos. The guy loved peppers. He took a little cup full of them and made himself a sammich. He didn't have a fork and the boy was anxious so he dipped both hands in the cups and placed the peppers between slices of bread. He ate, then decided to go to the bathroom.

    There was no wiping or washing of the hands...just concentrated habanero and jalapeno hot stuff.

    My buddy, gary, then takes a leak.

    Not 5 minutes later, he's done, and starts to feel uncomfortable.

    Intense burning sensations are coming in places that aren't suppose to feel this way without physical contact.

    10 minutes pass and the kid is on fire. He thinks something is seriously wrong with him...he doesn't correlate the peppers and the unwashed hands with the burning pecker.

    He takes a shower...which was a bad idea. It spreads it around some more...he's freaking out and about to walk to the ER (being at university with a medical school has its advantages) when his boss, an MD comes in...he sees the guy sweating etc...sits him down and asks him a series of questions and quickly figures out that it was the peppers that were irritating his employee's pecker. Pouring a little milk on there fixed everything up. LOL.

    All he kept on saying was "thank God I didn't go into the ER because I could just see the med students laughing their asses off at me".

    moral of the story, when eating peppers, make sure you wash your hands before taking a leak.

    and yes, it was very funny to see this guy squirm.
    My mother makes and sells salsa. I was helping her one day, prepping habaneros. I didn't think about it and went to take a leak. I'm sure I don't need to finish this story.

    3 days before I could crank one off again.
    If one person can do something, anyone can learn to do it.
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